Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Happy birthday to me~

Mum bought me my birthday present.. Sometimes it really amazes me; in spite of our frequent quarrels (we just had one yesterday), in spite of all the headaches I'd given her throughout all this 20 years of my existence in this world, she still dotes on me like no one else.. I'm really grateful to her for all her love and patience but I just tend to forget all that she's done for me when I'm angry or when I'm just selfishly thinking of myself..
So typical of us humans huh? We're always this way.. Hence the saying
'' The only way to love is to realise that it could be lost.''
It's so damn right.
But somehow, we always tend to forget the all the good things someone who genuinely loves and cares for us does for us.. We only remember the bad ones. Therefore, although I know a simple apology can't make up for all the mistakes I made in the past, I would lik to say Sorry to the people I've done wrong, whether intentionally or unintentionally and those whom I'd hurt in all these years. If I could turn back the hands of the clock, I would right click and press the ''undo'' button on my many, many selfish decisions. But I can't. And I'm not regretting, simply because I always feel that without those many mistakes made I wouldn't have learnt so much about the ways of the world. To others, I'd lost a lot. To me, I'd just lost my naviety.. And I'm glad for it, because in this dog-eat-dog world I can't be naive if i want to survive.
Anyway, now I've made my decision and I'm trying to stick to it, to make the best out of it, because what had already been done is done. It's not a decision I'm wholeheartedly happy with, but for once I want to try not to think of myself but for others..
So why do i still feel so terrible??
*Happy birthday to myself*

Posted @ [4:09 PM]

My birthday's tomorrow!

TOMORROW'S MY BIRTHDAY!!
Waited long for this day, but somehow when it's approaching I realise that I have nothing to look forward to-
Except to drink, dance and get pissed. What else?
A table has been booked for me, but I'm gonna have to split myself into 3 pieces so that I can be at 3 different places at the same time; where all my friends are.
Really wish to spend tonight with you happily~

Posted @ [2:15 PM]

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

song lyrics: Have you ever -Brandy

Have ever loved somebody so muchIt makes you cryHave you ever needed something so hardYou can´t sleep at nightHave ever tried to find the wordsBut they don´t come out rightHave you ever, Have you everHave you ever been in loveBeen in love so badYou´d do anything to make them understandHave you ever had someone steal your heart awayYou´d give anything to make them feel the sameHave you ever searched for words to get you in their heartBut you don´t know what to sayAnd you don´t know where to startHave ever loved somebody so muchIt makes you cryHave you ever needed something so hardYou can´t sleep at nightHave ever tried to find the wordsBut they don´t come out rightHave you ever, Have you everHave you ever found the oneYou´ve dreamed of all your lifeYou´d do anything to look into their eyesHave you finally found the one you´ve given your heartOnly to find that one won´t give their heart to youHave you ever closed your eyes andDreamed that they were thereAnd all you can do is wait for that day when they will careWhat do I gotta do to get you in my arms babyWhat do I gotta do to get your heartTo make you understand how I need you next to meGotta get you in my world´Coz baby I can´t sleep

Posted @ [12:29 AM]

Monday, December 29, 2008

too late

Kim, me, Sindy @DF on sat. I look so damn fat, I want to go on a diet already la.

P.S: Kim, haven't seen you for ages, it was a nice surprise=)

Feel like a load off my chest, got my thoughts out.
Was not my intention at first; just wanted something to confide in.
Wish to write more, but I'll have to be discreet, because there are lots of people reading this...
If you know what I mean.
You asked me what was I thinking, you wanted to know my thoughts.
And so, you've been reading my blog.
But does it make a difference? You will never understand my intentions, or what I'm thinking.
You always don't.

Think I'd like to reveal this side of me to you? You're wrong.

Because to me, I hate to wear my heart on my sleeve.

Because then, you could grasp at my weakness easily.
Doesn't matter anyway, what's past is past, what had happened doesn't change, and I have no one to blame but myself; no use crying over split milk.
You'd asked me so many questions, but I don't have all the answers.
-I'm searching for them too.
Sometimes, when I see all the happy couples around me, I can't have but feel a tinge of envy.
After all, I could actually be like them.
I'm not regretting my actions, but I'm just implying that if only I could turn back the time, maybe I wouldn't have made this decision... And no, I'm not comparing.
It's just that I finally realised what's important to me..

But it's too late now.

Posted @ [10:03 PM]

missed ;

I've been kept busy these few days; but somehow, I feel like something's amiss.

And I know what.. Or rather, who.

But there's nothing I can do,

except to just stand by the sidelines,

watching,

waiting with bated breath.

Because I''d hurt him enough,

and I can't, and don't intend to get the best of both worlds.

I know I'd let him down in so many ways.

He was the one who'd helped me wake up; to learn the ways of life; how to give others the basic respect they deserve.

And yet, in spite of all this, he was the one who'd sacrificed.

But I really don't wish to go on hurting anyone; I'm not a sadist, I just don't believe in love.

But I do know that I'm a very lucky person; to be missed, doted on and loved.

I don't wish to take things for granted anymore; like how I did in the past.

If I could turn back time, I would never leave you.

I know I've hurt you a lot; I can't even begin to imagine how much,

and I'm truly sorry.

I truly belong in your arms; we both know it- we really fit together.

But there's something stopping me.

I keep thinking of our kiss, how we both long for each other,

and I really wish that you'll take me away, help me make my decision.

But somehow, you choose to leave, not beacuse of yourself like how you claim,

but because you wouldn't want to put me in a spot.

And although I don't blame you,

I really really miss you.

Posted @ [4:46 PM]

sweet memories

Ah Cai =)
We couldn't wait to take off our shoes.Soooooooooooo relaxedSolo! This is the room.....

Look at Yingyong's face =)SiblingsThey're shy. Smoking

Xinyi & Xinyi !She does't want me to snap her pic, but....... Singing buddies

Fighting over the remote control :) My fat & relaxed face =)
*

Shall make this short and sweet;

let the pics do the talking.

Had a really fun and relaxing day.

Clique includes me, Yingyong, his sisters Xinyi (the same name as me=]), Shirley and his cousins Ah Cai and Amanda (the same name as my sis=]).

Woke up early, at 8am.

Went to wedding buffet at clarke quay,

then k-caster at chinatown from 3-10pm,

then st james at night.

Drank, drank, drank for whole day,

but still wasn't enough.

Lots of things happened at st james,

but I shadn't elaborate.

All I can only say is, the events really kept me thinking...

Of you.

Posted @ [12:29 AM]

Friday, December 26, 2008

Very super unfair- someone can view my blog as and when she likes but I can't do the same for hers.. No permission from her. Hmmphs!
Anyway, don't really have much energy to do anything because I'm just simply dead beat.. Chest starting to feel constricted too.. Could it be that I ate too much earlier on?

Posted @ [8:43 PM]

sleepy

Feeling sleepy now, woke up at 7.20am today just to attend class. Didn't really felt much like going; felt like going back to sleep, what with the rain the post-holiday mood and all that. But of course, i didn't. Have to go to class even if it's a repeat lesson which i attended before so as to refresh my memory and to make it a habit to always turn up.

However.......................... I was duped, and I am so damn pissed off. Took the fucking mrt to orchard; stood for 40 whole minutes the whole journey, rushed through the early morning crowd, reached orchard at 9.40am, walked to far east plaza and nearly getting lost in the process, then waited for Jovin. She reached in a short while, then we proceeded to Subway for our incredibly rushed breakfast. Had laughs and kept up with each other in between her turkey sub and my mini ham sub, then smoked as fast as we could so that we could reach class in time and to avoid our tutor's glare if we turned up late. When we reached, there wasn't a single sign of any of our classmates and our tutor; went to check the school's timetable, we were asked to wait in an empty and dark room all by ourselves as stated on the timetable. Jovin then msged our tutor, who replied saying that she had an ITE seminar and she did send us a msg informing us. Well, at least she apologised, it wasn't really her fault anyway. And she even knew both of our names! Guess the Jovin and I are really infamous in our school, and maybe, like Jovin says ''the lunchtime gossip'' which i doubt. Anyway, what is it with the fucking school's system? I'd changed my mobile number and reminded the receptionist over and over again but why is it that you guys somehow just can't seem to get it right? You guys wasted our beauty sleep, money and effort. Not to mention the fact that I could actually go to work today if I was informed. Imbeciles. Don't try your hand at something unless you have the capability and unless you give your best. Well, I guess that's just cheap labour for you.

Went to ang mo kio, bishan, yishun then ang mo kio again. I'm so dead beat. And one more thing- I have to make a decision soon.

Posted @ [8:05 PM]

Thursday, December 25, 2008

tired

Sis, Me, Yingyong @powerhouse

*
It's 10.52am early in the morning on x'mas and here am I blogging! A little too early huh.. No choice, got woken up this morning at 9 plus and couldn't get back to sleep from there.. I'm horribly exhausted.

Hit the clubs last night, it was a last minute decision on my part. Went with Yingyong and friends to powerhouse at first, among which were Kenneth, Matthew and lots and lots of (plump) malay girls. Oops! Hope they don't read this! Even if they are plump, not good dancers but have enough courage to dance on top on the platform, they were friendly though... My dearest bestest sis Sindy came down later on; she didn't disappoint me like I thought she would, because something cropped up for her at the very last minute. Glad she could still make it; with her I had truckloads of nonstop fun! Love you gal! Eh, thought you say don't want to step into St James especially on xmas eve? Haha...

The queue was damn long when I just reached. For those of you who've been there, imagine the queue from powerhouse stretching to DF! Luckily, luckily, Yingyong could sign me in from the VIP queue, so as people were queuing, waiting, (and cursing us silently in their hearts) we just spent a mere 2 minutes, and voila! We're in! The music was rocking too, which was, according to me, higher than the average powerhouse standard. Ask me, I'm the expert in this field.=)

Went out at around 1am to wait for Sindy; needed to sign her in through VIP queue. She was delayed by her daughter's cries so I decided to kill time by going to the toilet, etc. Was already out of powerhouse and didn't want to squeeze past the crowd again, so went to the toilet at movida. Hell, I can't even begin to describe the length of that queue. All I know is, I'm debating on whether to bring a plastic bag of my own on the 31st if I am hitting the clubs, and I felt like my bladder was going to burst anytime!

Okay, so I survived. Back to powerhouse where Sindy met up with one of her friends who, in turn, brought another 2 friends of her own. Asked Sindy if those girls have their own table, she said yes. Turned out, no. Wanted to go to DF but couldn't because of these 3 leeches, they followed us everywhere we went. Helloooo! Thought you said that you have your own table? Why stick to us like bloody leeches and get in our way of going to DF? Dumped them at Yingyong's table with instructions for him that he doesn't have to bother about the 3 leeches; they aren't my friends anyway so it's none of my business. Psst. I hate people who get in my way or bloody delay me.

And then finally................DF! You might wonder why I couldn't wait to get there. Answer = all my friends that I have not seen for a long time are there. And man, did I saw a lot of people. Went to Ivan's and Jason's table.. Surprised and amused to learn from Ivan that Jason actually fought with a guy before we came. Evidence- there were only 2 out of his 7 buttons left and one of his eyes was bigger and more swollen than the other. Jason, I didn't know you had it in you.=) In case you have no idea, Jason and Ivan are what you call the gentlemanly type. They give up their seats to girls, put a protective hand around you should a man keep shoving you around.. And Ivan would even open car doors for me. Sweet huh? That's why I was surprised to learn that Jason actually fought, and it was because of an asshole who molested his girlfriend(?). That guy deserved it, whereas Jason did not deserve that swollen eye. Trying to do justice for others and then doing injustice to ownself ~poor guy. Anyway, I haven't seen Ivan in a long time and he's just as sweet (and flirtish) as before. Sindy says she can tell that he likes me. I dunno, he used to, and same on my part. But now?........ Saw so many, so many people yesterday. I won't even start to mention names. All I can just say is, someone still never changes. Called me up so many times during the evening but when you saw me you acted like we were strangers. It's okay with me, I played along with you but I really can't figure out why everywhere I go I'll see you even though your table is so far away, not to mention the one time you walked past just right after I mentioned your name to Sindy. Hmm, now that I think of it, maybe you did it on purpose? You could always locate me at my seats no matter where in the past.. However, you'd got a telling-off from me at the smoking area for interrupting while I was talking to Sindy. Ha, serve you right for being so conceited! Want to pretend that we don't know each other, okay with me, but then don't purposely come stand beside me when there are so many other empty spaces; one look at you and I knew you had a drop too high. And I was right.

Went to the ladies and music changed from r & b to the boring live band. Disappeared to powerhouse then. Actually, part of me wanted to stay in DF. Feeling a little guilty going off just like that, without a proper goodbye to Jason and Ivan. I did, however, sent an sms to Ivan afterwards telling him I'd left DF. I think he guessed too; it'd been more than half an hour by that time, and didn't I always disappear halfway too in the past with them? Anyway, a goodbye would only make me more unbearable to leave, for reasons I shall not state. And there's this bitch I know with a really terrible attitude problem who always quarrels with other friends of hers saying that they seduced her boyfriend, when in actual fact her boyfriend is the one going around flirting. No, I wasn't the one she accused and if I was, I would stand up for myself not like................. See? You're such an ass, til your fucking attitude is pushing him away from you. Oh, why am I being such a bitch, I should sympathise with her. Anyway,
*kiss my ass*
To wish me a merry christmas, you needn't have to hold my hands. Which was what he r boyfriend did and even had the cheek to tell me that his girlfriend was just a few steps behind! I pulled my hand away, of course. I have absolutely no lack of suitors and even if all the men have died and there was only him left, I would rather shave my head bald and become a nun. Okay, so I'm exagerrating, but to me he's just plain average, not as good as she makes him out to be. Anyway, if my boyfriend did this I would have boxed him right in the eye and kicked him right in the groin already. Yes, I know I'm harsh; this is why they say ''Never offend a woman.''

Almost vomited in the end, ordered a waterfall to share with Sindy. Wah, powerhouse's waterfall is damn different from DF's. It's so concentrated! And by the way Yingyong's friend Matthew was so happy yesterday because of the many girls surrounding him (courtesy of me, haha). He was especially happy dancing with Sindy and loved our teasing. Ate Mac breakfast (yummy!) before heading back to sleep.

Merry Christmas dear diary and beloved friends and family~

Posted @ [10:52 AM]

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

7 more freaking days to my birthday!

Few months ago; looking really sweet at work. I miss those cheeks=)

You are such an arse.

I hate the hold you've got over me; the countless times of checking my mobile to check for any messages or missed calls from you. Can't imagine the length of your smirk or the look on your conceited face if you actually know what I am thinking about now.
Ha, typically you.
Trust me to get so emotional now. Friends who understand me dearly know that I never wear my heart on my sleeve. I always seem like I do not give a hoot, when in actual fact I do care.
In a mixed state of feelings now, I feel excited and a little happy, wondering what lies in store for me this festive season, but on the other hand, I feel sick of it. So many choices, which to choose? Lots of friends asking me out, but like always, I reject them all. Reasons are as stated below-
1) They go to places I deem boring.
2) I don't feel very comfortable with those I am not that close with, unless one of my gfs tag along, which I think isn't possible due to their packed schedules. (Speaking of which, my gfs hardly have time for me now:( Either they are attached, preggies, workaholics or mothers.But I still love them all the same la.)
3) Some guys are trying to date me; I wouldn't want to give them the wrong impression.
4) Some I am not familiar with but still have the cheek to ask me out.
5) Boring company. *yawns
The fussy, choosy and very demanding me. Just call me Your Highness haha=)
Decisions, decisions. Movie? Nah, too boring. Pub? Gotta see whom I'm going with. Countdown? Absolutely not. To have myself pushed and shoved and molested? Not to mention being sprayed by the aerosol sprays all thanks to foreign workers and ruining my hair, makeup and clothes in the process.. This is why I never, ever go to countdowns, and I don't intend to.
Just realised, just 7 more days to go to my 20th birthday! Whoo~ How time flies! I'm also in a mess deciding my birthday celebration; I still have nothing in mind.
One thing I know, if I could just celebrate christmas and my birthday with him, I will be contented. For the time being.

Labels: c

Posted @ [3:48 PM]

x'mas eve

Me & Amanda from Kenzo ; taken during that period of time in my life where everything was happening all at once

Been slacking at home for the past 2 days, because I want to rest enough for X'mas eve... Went to chomp chomp to eat around 10pm yesterday, then back home again at midnight. What's my program for tonight? Feel like partying...
Someone sent me a sms early this morning, urging me to think about what I want in life and now just float around. Yes, that is perfectly true. It was what I've been doing for the past 6 months, after the disastrous break up with my ex of 2 years.. I'd lost all hope in love and threw away my aspirations and goals. But now, it won't be happening anymore. I will stand up on my own two feet. So what if I'd fell once?
I'm really puzzled.. No matter what I do, I just seem to hurt people around me... Those who genuinely care about me. And I always don't seem to realise this fact until I have hurt them deeply, and for most of them our friendship/relationship is not, and will not ever be the same anymore. And I know why all these happens- because I make decisions based on my own selfishness. I always put myself in first priority, and sometimes the only priority. I have to change.
Anyway, today is x'mas eve! Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way~ And I still have no plans yet.. Who wants to bring me out?=)
My blog counter has really picked up alot, the meter is always increasing by at least 20 since the last time i checked.. Hmm.. I wonder who's been reading my blog................................. Tag leh~ Or else I will keep wondering if it's him.. Hope to spend my christmas with him~
Merry Christmas !

Posted @ [11:58 AM]

Tuesday, December 23, 2008

holiday mood

Why am i so gan cheong.. today's just the 23rd, eve is tomorrow.

Yet I'm in my holiday mood already...

Ha, already making plans with friends.

And one imbecile (meaning something like retard) has already ruined a teeny part of my mood

*Fuck you*

In future when I have my fun-filled activity going on, I'm gonna invite the whole world.....

But you.

You may call me harsh, but that's the way I really am.

I don't hide behind masks, I show my true self by being straightforward (or as some may call it, blunt).

You treat me nicely, I do so to you.

You treat me badly, I'll return you triple.

Anyway, my one christmas wish would be to spend it with a certain someone...

*ponders

Feel like going to DF, but it's gonna be damn crowded... One step at a time then.

*Don't look forward to too much, because you'll just get disappointed in the end.

I've learnt the hard way that things don't always go your way

-And less so when you expect them to.

Anyway, notice my blog's new makeover?

I so damn love it.

Of course, being the IT retard that I totally am, I'm perfectly incapable of coming up with such stuff...

And the award goes to...................... Amanda! My one and only blood sister.

It's beautiful and pink enough.. Just simply perfect.

Have linked Amanda's and Jovin's.. As i view their blogs I realised that they have lots of friends who blog....

As for me, my close friends don't blog. Either they don't have computers at home, are pregnant or are just simply not interested in blogging.

Some do, but I didn't bother to ask for their emails.

And my favourite part of the blog is.................. The wishlist!!!

Ha, typical.

Okay then, gonna stop my entry here. Ta-ta!

Posted @ [3:30 PM]

Monday, December 22, 2008

missing you

Was taken quite long ago. I'm thinner, grumpier and less loved now.
*

Yes, it's been the longest winter without you.

I don't think you know it. Can't picture your reaction if you do.

Would you smile in triumph, and exclaim ''I told you so!'',

or would you boast about it, and then pretend not to care when you actually do?

Or would you totally ignore me, and then go tell my good friend you wouldn't want me back,

when you actually love me?

And would you, like how you did in the past,

say hurtful stuff to methat made my heart break...

and tears drop?

I bet you would.

So that's why I'm keeping mum.. There's no point in complicating things and attracting trouble.. I've had enough of it, thank you very much.

If you happen to read this, you probably would be racking your brains guessing who I'm talking about, hoping that it's you, thinking that it's probably not, probably some other guys,

but

it's not what you think it is.

Doesn't matter anyway.

Like you said, I'm the one who created this ending.. And I don't deny that fact.You keep asking me what do I want.. All I can say is, I don't have a clue.

You know me, you know I'm not easily contented.. In fact, it's an understatement. However, you have given me many happy memories that lingers in me.. I miss those times. But there were problems for us too.. Keyword is for, not between. Now I realise that you were right. There isn't any problems internally, but externally. At least we were happy then.

Why am I getting so upset and emotional now? It's not like it's something that happened just recently; it has actually been months.

I don't believe in love, experiences taught me that. It might exist, but always, without fail, short-lived. I may have loved and lost, but you have given me happy times, and vice versa.. How we fit together like two pieces of jigsaw puzzle pieces.........

Too late now.

**And the question marks are suspended from my heart without any solutions ;

Posted @ [3:29 PM]

song lyrics: better in time- love this song

It's been the longest winter without you I didn't know where to turn to See somehow i can't forget you After all that we've been through Going ,Coming Thought i heard a knock Thinking that (I deserve it) Now i have realised that i really didn't knooOooOw If you didn't notice You mean everything (quickly I'm learning) To love again (all i know is) I'm be oooOook Thought i couldn't live without you It's going to hurt when it heals too Even though i really love you I'm gonna smile because i deserve too I could of turned on the TV Without something that would remind me Was it all that easy? To just put us out your feeling If i'm dreamin Don't want to let it (hurt my feelings) But that's the past (i believe it) And i know that, time will heal it If you didn't notice Well you mean everything (quickly i'm learning) turn up again (All i know is) I'm be ok Thought i couldn't live without you It's gonna hurt when it heals too Even though i really love you I'm gonna smile because i deserve too Since there's no more you and me This time i let you go so i can be free And Live my life how it should be No matter how hard it is I will be fine without you Yes i Will Thought i couldn't live without you It's gonna hurt when it heals too Even though i really loved you I'm gonna smile cos i deserve too yes i do Thought i couldn't live without you It's gonna hurt when it heals too Even though i really loved you Going to smile cos i deserve too

Posted @ [3:09 PM]

Left unsaid

Just publicised my blog.

If you happen to read this, there's a message I desperately want to convey to you:

''I miss you so much, it hurts.''

*All good things come to an end. So it is with sadness that we say goodbye..

Posted @ [1:19 AM]

I'm l0vin' it!

Sindy & I. Girl's night out. I look fat.. Hmmph!`

What am I loving? My life of course.. What's not to love about it?

Went to a pub cum disco named ''fat cat'' (what a funny name for a pub ) with dearest sis Sindy. I wore that black dress with black belt as what you saw in my previous entry. (Was blogging my previous entry before i went out.) Sindy wore three quarters with a black vest blouse.. She looked spunky, nicer than what i usually saw her in because this outfit really flattered instead of concealing her figure. Really let my hair down and enjoyed myself. Haven't seen her for a long long time and a night out bitching with her was totally what the doctor ordered for me. Met lots of new people too..

*winks*

She never changes. Life is still as complicated for her as usual, and I know she loves it this way.

Like me, we both love challenges... In fact, we thrive on it. Without challenges things would get boring for us. This is how we embrace life.=) Like what I told her yesterday, ''I don't want him to like me only, I want him wrapped around my little finger.''

And I always succeed.

Sometimes I see really incompatible couples.. The female is so fucking pretty, and the male......... Well, lets just describe him as hopeless.

*slaps cheeks*

And then I wonder..........

How can she possibly fuck him???

Enough said, back to myself. Someone, who shall remain unnamed due to certain reasons, had told her that he misses me. Was surprised when i heard that. After so long.........................................

Time really flies. It's past midnight already and I'm fucking hungry even though I just had my first meal of the day 2 hours ago.. Something wrong with me? I keep eating.....

Gonna stop here, time for my next decision to make. Order mcdelivery or sleep?.......

Posted @ [12:17 AM]

Saturday, December 20, 2008

party tonight? i hope so..

perfect.

outfit of the day.
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too dark.

damn love those curls today!
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mine !!
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Not gonna write much because I'm in a rush for time..

Overall it's been quite a day filled with activities, but I wouldn't call it busy

Hopefully, will be busy later...

-Busy partying.-

Not confirmed yet, but I hope so..

Haven't met up with my gals in a long looooooong time!

Okay, shall stop here, I'm in a rush to go to bugis.

More pics above jus4!

Posted @ [8:07 PM]

Friday, December 19, 2008

hectic

The latest me.

It's been quite a hectic day for me,

but i love things this way.

It occupies my time and keeps my brain working and allows me to sleep easiler at night.

Rushing for time; gonna keep this short and sweet.

Went to class slightly later than usual today,

then went out after class.

Happened to read something;

don't know why but it keeps repeating over and over again in my mind:

''Memories of you keep lingering in me.''

Posted @ [8:25 PM]

Thursday, December 18, 2008

class

I'm working hard.. see? =)
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My love for quality stuff- pamper me~ Bored in class til i snap a pic of this.
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see the beautifully drawn flower by me?=)
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peek-a-boo! in class...
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Me & Jovin- I'm growing to love her! Not taken today though..
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Feeling so proud of myself for enduring a whole lesson of theory today:) Ha, a lesson that i could actually miss also.. Here i go again, don't keep thinking of missing class! Even though this is repeat lesson, I've got all the notes but still it doesn't hurt right? It's not like I anything else to do anyway besides going out. Going out=spending money, so yeah, going to class is better.

Class was surpisingly fun today.. I kind of dreaded it before today, because I'm in a new class now as I've transferred to another batch. New faces, and I don't really like to make small talk or whatsoever. Thankfully, today didn't require me to. Luckily for Jovin, at least I have someone I know with me all the time in class, she made class fun too.=) Had much to catch up with her too because we haven't been to class for quite some time. Our class turned out to be okay.. Haha, we talked about lots of stuff today.. (To her bf-we didn't gossip about you, don't worry!=] ) Anyway, we almost went to smoke xisha today...

Heard about xisha long time ago, but haven't had the chance to try it out yet. It's perfectly legal, and from what i heard from Ferlyn, after smoking it she felt high haha! It's perfectly harmless to by the way.. They charge for like, i think 10 bucks plus for an hour? Hmm.. I'm curious..

Spent on indulge today too, no, I won't allow myself to feel guilty. I haven't really really shopped for a long time! And this is just small stuff, no need to sweat over it. I bought a handphone strap today at a whooping price of $17.90. It's not prada, gucci, or dior so don't expect a couple hundred bucks. Though my dream handphone strap is actually a dior one at a really whooping price of $200++, but I shall have to settle for this first. I'm not rich now you know, I still haven't started work yet. Shall take the picture of the handphone strap tomorrow and post it here because they needed 20 minutes to complete it and I decided to collect it tomorrow.

Speaking of which, I love blogging! With everything that happens, I'm reminded of my dear blog, and i just want to snap and snap pictures.. Haha, Jovin and I snapped so many pictures today ( in class, shall I say ) just to paste it on our blogs! And I was almost caught because of the damn flashlight.. I thought I'd turned it off and the flash just went off in the middle of lecture. People turned around to look at my direction, and what could I do? I feigned ignorance, of course.

Class again tomorrow, looking forward to it! (for once, miraculously.) Hmm.. And looking forward to after class to.. I'm definitely going out! Now, where to?..................

By the way, someone quarrelled with me over practically nothing. It's so damn stupid, I don't even wish to mention it. Whatever, it's not gonna spoil my mood.

Some pics for ya, enjoy!=)

Posted @ [8:28 PM]

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

at last.

Me half a year ago -was so chubby.

Yingyong & me.

And again.....

Ferlyn, Me, bitch @DFLY

Me, the bitch
*
*
*

Gordan & me @ DFLY.
*
*
*

Steve & me @breathless.
*

Charlie's Angels -Me, our event organiser and my bestie.
@sim lim game show.

Me & the bitch's son. Donkey months ago.

Me & sis.. I love my friends!

Family & Shun. He's history.

HK Nov'07.

bitch,Ferlyn, Me.

@Powerhose.

My F480.. Love it big time!

Ferlyn, a bitch, Me @Powerhouse.

Me &......

@helipad. -that place sucks big time.

Me & Chuhong
@DFLY.. where else?

JUST ME !

Home now, quite tired too.

Gonna rest for today, having class tomorrow.

Can't choose not to go already, because they're starting a new module now.

Guess I really have to buck up, I can't go on like this -living life aimlessly.

Dad forked out $7000 for my course fees, Mum and family forked out their hopes.

-Can't let them down-

And myself too.

But sometimes I can't help feeling bored out by all these.

So many things, so little time.

But I can't go on being a selfish damn brat.

Anyway, nothing's happened at home, no one's bursting into rage.

However...........

Mum's giving me the cold shoulder.

Guess it's okay with me too, i had enough of the nagging.

Home sweet home.

P.S: Posted some pics of me & friends.. Enjoy! Btw I'm so loving my new pink F480!

Posted @ [2:49 PM]

Monday, December 15, 2008

getting on my nerves..

Time to blog- my newest stress release therapy..

Gotta work out all those nerves- they're all tensed up..

And even more so whenever i think of facing the music.

Hmm..wonder what lies in store for me?

I don't regret my actions, though i will reconsider my decision if i had the extraordinary power to turn back time.

Simply because, one decision, be it major or minor, made by a very selfish me, will lead to the worries of many people who genuinely care about me.

Yes i know it is a teeny weeny bit too late to realise this..

It's not that i'm only realising now, it's just that i've made enough decisions judging on others' feelings that i'm now sick of it all..

I desperately want to be the selfish little 14 year old girl i once was..

That who did things without ever considering others, who just did what she liked as and when..

But not anymore.

Because,

I'm no longer the little girl i once was.

Or am i?

By the way,

added a new blogskin to my blog today..

Damn love it,

Its perfect- simple and pink enough with the falling hearts.

Hope you like it too=)

And wish me good luck; I need it badly.

Posted @ [11:37 PM]

time to face the music..

Time to face the music later..

I'm dreading it, but I've got no choice.

I'm all worn out.. I'm exhausted, tired out from insufficient sleep accumulated over many days; esp these past 2 days.

Don't know why but i just can't seem to sleep early already nowadays..

Instead I'm only able to sleep when it's at least 4am..

Haven't had my coffee for today, so I guess I'm gonna be mumbling rubbish......

So tired yet that girl keeps on calling.. Can't she get a life??

I'm okay to talk, but just not now.

I'm grumpy can't you tell?

Another day of watching endless tv and being a couch potato..

Which reminds me, training for work is starting tomorrow..10-6!

And here was i thinking it'll be around 10-1... Now Angie this is what you told me.. (-_-'')

I am so freaking tired!!!

Thanks to yesterday..Hmmp!

Posted @ [4:56 PM]